Tuesday, August 26, 2008

The Pastor's Ass

The Pastor's Ass

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again.

The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey..

The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day: NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.

The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.

The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

The bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is . . . being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery . . even shorten your life. So be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll be a lot happier and live longer!

Monday, August 25, 2008

13 Rules That Indians Live By

Here Are the 13 Rules / Laws That India Lives By

1. The Other Side Law:

If my side of the road has a traffic jam, then I can start driving on the wrong side of the road, and all incoming cars will be rerouted via Meerut.

2. The No Queue Rule:

If there is a queue of many people, no one will notice me sneaking into the front as long as I am looking the other way.

3. The Mind over Matter Law:

If a red light is not working, four cars from different directions can easily pass through one another.

4. The Auto Axiom:

If I indicate which way I am going to turn my vehicle, it is an information security leak.

5. The In Spit of Thing:

The more I lean out of my car or bus, and the harder I spit, the stronger the roads become.

6. The Cinema Hall Fact:

If I get a call on my mobile phone, the film automatically goes into pause mode.

7. The Baraat/ Marriage Right:

When I'm on the road to marriage, all the roads in the city belong to me. To ME.

8. The Heart Of Things:

If I open enough buttons on my shirt, the pretty girl at the bus stop can see through my mal-deformed chest into the depths of my soul.

9. The Name Game:

It is very important for the driver behind me to memorize the nicknames of my children.

10. Parking Up The Wrong Tree:

When I double-park my car, the road automatically widens so that the traffic is not affected.

11. The Chill Bill Move:

When I park and block someone else's car I am giving him a chance to pause, relax, chill and take a few moments off from his rushed day.

12. The Bus Law:

If I stop my bus at the correct place near the bus stop, the city will explode and blow into 6 million pieces.

13. The VIP Rule:

There are only 3 important persons in this city -Me, I, and Myself!

Aren't these rules followed religiously and with vigor in all cities and towns in our 'Mera Bharat Mahan'?

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Secret Of Peter Answers

Peteranswers.com: The Peter Answers Computer Prank What is it?

The Peter Answers (or peteranswers.com) Computer Prank is a magical virus, pure and simple. It’s spread from host to host through word of mouth and has an incubation period limited only to a carrier’s access to a computer with internet connection.
How is it spread? It all starts with an initial carrier–some individual who knows the secret trick to this hypnotic prank. It works like magic, and if you knows it, you most definitely have the power–hypnotic power, psychic power. Once you know the magic, all you need to do is simply hop on a computer, zip to the Internet and go to peteranswers.com

Once at the site, all you have to do to memorize your audience, is draw attention to the idea that there’s an entity within the Internet that can answer all of your questions. What happens next, is what reminds me of a David Blaine trick. Because it’s pure magic.

Pure genius.

In the first box, the keyboardist types in the petition:

“Peter, please answer the following:”

In the second box the typist enters whatever question they’d like–usually from the growing crowd.

“What is Karan's middle name?”

Upon hitting the return button, Peter, from his comfortable couch at peteranswers.com, instantly answers the question. Correctly.

How does peteranswers.com work? Subtle Mind Control.

Like I said, I’d already lost over half the room. Even if I’d ordered all computers shut down, they’d still be thinking about how to do the magic trick for the rest of the day. I’m not kidding. Peteranswers.com had a firm hold of people's minds, i personally was addicted to it as peter never answered me and answered only to my friend and i wasn’t letting go any time soon this kept on and on till 3 days . So I figured I might as well do a little research. With Google’s help, it didn’t take me long to figure it out. And once I did, I knew peteranswers.com had met it’s match. As with any infectious illusion, the best way to vaccinate is to simply reveal the magic trick. There’s really nothing like a quick medicine of the truth. Sure, the David Blaine impostors will be furious at having their trick exposed. But being precise this causes manic-obsessive behavior whichs are the symptoms of the Peter Answers Computer Prank virus itself.

Peteranswers.com: The Magic Tricks Revealed

First, instead of typing in the petition box, “Peter, please answer the . . .” begin by instead typing: “.” That’s right. Simply type a period. What happens next is pure magical genius. Instead of seeing what you’d expect (a “.”) you see a “P”. Then type whatever the heck you want and the rest of the phrase “Peter, please answer the following” appears. As long as nobody pays any attention to where your fingers are actually landing the prank works slick. The trick to the prank is to here type in the answer to whatever question you are going to ask next. When you’re done just keep typing until the phrase is complete. Whenever you hit the “:” your cursor will jump to the next box–where you’ll type in the actual question. Hit return and bingo! Whatever you really typed into the petition box appears.
Now stop dilly dallying and get on over to the real Peter Answers web site and have some fun!
But Make sure you dont hurt someones feeling with lies as you know Truth Never Hides ........

Five Lessons About How To Treat People

Five Lessons About How To Treat People

1. First Important Lesson - "Know The Cleaning Lady"
During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"
Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.
"Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello."
I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

2. Second Important Lesson - "Pickup In The Rain"
One night, at 11:30 p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.
A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab.
She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home.
A special note was attached. It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away. God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."
Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.

3. Third Important Lesson - "Remember Those Who Serve"
In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. "How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked. "50¢," replied the waitress.
The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it.
"Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient. "35¢!" she brusquely replied.
The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left.
When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies. You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.

4. Fourth Important Lesson - "The Obstacles In Our Path"
In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.
Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand - "Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition."

5. Fifth Important Lesson - "Giving When It Counts"
Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare and serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year-old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes, I'll do it if it will save her."
As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheeks. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away?".
Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.

I'm Yours by Jason Mraz

a really nice song with relaxing beats...

Monday, August 18, 2008

Lunar Eclipse

Have You Ever Seen something so beautiful and Amazing ,Trust me its for Real

Sunday, August 17, 2008


sometimes picture says it all

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Shamur feat. Milad - The one

my new video FROM SHAMUR FEAT MILAD - THE ONE check it out and let me know ur feedback ;-)

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Amul Advertisments [ This is what i call advertisments ]

They are a Pro when it comes upto advertisments ..... love each and every creation, art and comicas of amul, its Just MInd talks ... but awsome !!

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Happy Friendship Day

GUYS just wanted to wish you'll " HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY " keep smiling .. cheers

Dumbest Kid !!

Dumbest Kid

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his
Customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it
to you."

The barber puts a five rupee coin in one hand and two one rupee coins in
the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?"

The boy takes the two one rupee coins and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out
of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question?

Why did you take two one rupee coins instead of five rupee coin?"
The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because THE DAY I TAKE THE FIVERUPEE COIN, THE GAME IS OVER !!!

Breaking News

Breaking news has assumed a new meaning for Indian news channels. Gone are the days when a breaking news came once in six months. The time of the kargil wars has passed. The times of cats, dogs and bollywood stars has begun.

Breaking News # 1

This "breaking news" ponders on the eating habits of Rahul (I assume Gandhi) and how these habits will help make a better India. What if he was eating pork or beef now? I wonder what kind of response that would have invoked.

Breaking News # 2

This "breaking news" is probably to bring to notice the new civil rights movement started for cats by cats. Cats have played second fiddle to dogs for a long time now and it seems they want to show some assertiveness that they are not to be taken lightly.

Breaking News # 3

This "breaking news" takes us through details on how and when Amitabh caught influenza (the common cold) and what repurcussions it will have for the times to come. Will Bollywood ever be the same again?

Breaking News # 4

This "breaking news" takes the viewers through the long Odysseus' like journey of the commisioner's dog and how it finally made it's way back home. I am sure this one made housewives weep.

Sad, really sad is all I can say.......Not only is this kind of news "sold", it's also "bought"

Saturday, August 2, 2008

New Blog alert

hay guys ive another Blog where you will find me mostly now ..... link is http://thekaranupadhya.blogspot.com ....... lemme know how you like it and keep in touch ;-) cheers !